Dear Walter:
I hope you can help me here. The other day I set off for work leaving my husband in the house watching the TV as usual. I hadn't gone more than a mile down the road when my engine conked out and the car shuddered to a halt. I walked back home to get my husband's help.
When I got home I couldn't believe my eyes. He was in the bedroom with a neighbor lady making mad passionate love to her. I am 32, my husband is 34 and we have been married for twelve years. When I confronted him, he broke down and admitted that he'd been having an affair for the past six months.
I told him to stop or I would leave him. He was let go from his job six months ago and he says he has been feeling increasingly depressed and worthless. I love him very much, but ever since I gave him the ultimatum he has become increasingly distant. I don't feel I can get through to him anymore.
Can you please help?
Sincerely,
Mrs. Sheila Usk
---------------------------------------------------
Dear Sheila:
A car stalling after being driven a short distance can be caused by a variety of faults with the engine. Start by checking that there is no debris in the fuel line. If it is clear, check the jubilee clips holding the vacuum pipes onto the inlet manifold. If none of these approaches solves the problem, it could be that the fuel pump itself is faulty, causing low delivery pressure to the carburetor float chamber.
I hope this helps.
Walter
Friday, December 21, 2007
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
Why sit when you can stand!!
See the following picture
http://picasaweb.google.com/eebai1/TInThePark2006/photo#5022188018638404242
So ladies, there's an idea for Christmas parties and last minute present ideas...
http://www.pmate.co.uk/demo.html
http://picasaweb.google.com/eebai1/TInThePark2006/photo#5022188018638404242
So ladies, there's an idea for Christmas parties and last minute present ideas...
http://www.pmate.co.uk/demo.html
Monday, December 10, 2007
This is Amazing!!
Forward this message to 5 people within 3 minutes and
F£$K ALL will happen!!
I tried it twice and it worked both times!
Absolutely F£$K ALL happened!!
THIS REALLY WORKS
Pass this on - more people need to know about this!!
F£$K ALL will happen!!
I tried it twice and it worked both times!
Absolutely F£$K ALL happened!!
THIS REALLY WORKS
Pass this on - more people need to know about this!!
Monday, November 12, 2007
Keepin' it real, like, isn't...
If you haven't seen these Armstrong & Miller sketches or live abroad and miss the BBC, check this out - it has to be some of the funniest sh!t I've seen for ages, isn't it, like, keepin' it real
Search youtube.com for "armstrong miller raf" for more brilliance!! such as
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jt5P_zvE5qY&NR=1
If you can't access the RAF guys via the BBC YouTubes, try them at this user
He/she has uploaded 8 of them - still pure genius!
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Air Force Test
This will drive you (and/or the kids!) nuts!! Have fun!
The object of the game is to move the red block around without getting hit by the blue blocks or touching the black walls.
If you can go longer than 18 seconds you are phenomenal. It's been said that the US Air Force uses this for fighter pilots. They are expected to go for at least 2 minutes.
Give it a try but be careful...it is addictive!!
Air Force Test
http://members.iinet.net.au/%7Epontipak/redsquare.html
The object of the game is to move the red block around without getting hit by the blue blocks or touching the black walls.
If you can go longer than 18 seconds you are phenomenal. It's been said that the US Air Force uses this for fighter pilots. They are expected to go for at least 2 minutes.
Give it a try but be careful...it is addictive!!
Air Force Test
http://members.iinet.net.au/%7Epontipak/redsquare.html
Sunday, October 21, 2007
Becoming illegal
(Adapt as appropriate to your own location)
A letter sent from a Maryland resident to his Senator
The Honorable Paul S. Sarbanes
309 Hart Senate Office Building
Washington DC , 20510
Dear Senator Sarbanes,
As a native Marylander and excellent customer of the Internal Revenue Service, I am writing to ask for your assistance. I have contacted the Department of Homeland Security in an effort to determine the process for becoming an illegal alien and they referred me to you. My primary reason for wishing to change my status from a U.S. Citizen to an illegal alien stems from the bill that was recently passed by the Senate, and for which you voted. If my understanding of this bill's provisions is accurate, as an illegal alien who has been in the United States for five years, all I need to do to become a citizen is to pay a $2,000 fine and income taxes for three of the last five years. I know a good deal when I see one and I am anxious to get the process started before everyone figures it out.
Simply put, those of us who have been here legally have had to pay taxes every year so I'm excited about the prospect of avoiding two years of taxes in return for paying a $2,000 fine. Is there any way that I can apply to be illegal retroactively? This would yield an excellent result for me and my family because we paid heavy taxes in 2004 and 2005.
Additionally, as an illegal alien I could begin using the local emergency room as my primary health care provider. Once I have stopped paying premiums for medical insurance, my accountant figures I could save almost $10,000 a year. Another benefit in gaining illegal status would be that my daughter would receive preferential treatment relative to her law school applications, as well as "in-state" tuition rates for many colleges throughout the United States for my son.
Lastly, I understand that illegal status would relieve me of the burden of renewing my driver's license and making those burdensome car insurance premiums. This is very important to me given that I still have college age children driving my car. If you would provide me with an outline of the process to become illegal (retroactively if possible) and copies of the necessary forms, I would be most appreciative. Thank you for your assistance.
Your Loyal Constituent,
Get your Forms NOW! Call your Internal Revenue Service
1-800-289-1040.
Please pass this onto your friends so they can save on this great offer too!
A letter sent from a Maryland resident to his Senator
The Honorable Paul S. Sarbanes
309 Hart Senate Office Building
Washington DC , 20510
Dear Senator Sarbanes,
As a native Marylander and excellent customer of the Internal Revenue Service, I am writing to ask for your assistance. I have contacted the Department of Homeland Security in an effort to determine the process for becoming an illegal alien and they referred me to you. My primary reason for wishing to change my status from a U.S. Citizen to an illegal alien stems from the bill that was recently passed by the Senate, and for which you voted. If my understanding of this bill's provisions is accurate, as an illegal alien who has been in the United States for five years, all I need to do to become a citizen is to pay a $2,000 fine and income taxes for three of the last five years. I know a good deal when I see one and I am anxious to get the process started before everyone figures it out.
Simply put, those of us who have been here legally have had to pay taxes every year so I'm excited about the prospect of avoiding two years of taxes in return for paying a $2,000 fine. Is there any way that I can apply to be illegal retroactively? This would yield an excellent result for me and my family because we paid heavy taxes in 2004 and 2005.
Additionally, as an illegal alien I could begin using the local emergency room as my primary health care provider. Once I have stopped paying premiums for medical insurance, my accountant figures I could save almost $10,000 a year. Another benefit in gaining illegal status would be that my daughter would receive preferential treatment relative to her law school applications, as well as "in-state" tuition rates for many colleges throughout the United States for my son.
Lastly, I understand that illegal status would relieve me of the burden of renewing my driver's license and making those burdensome car insurance premiums. This is very important to me given that I still have college age children driving my car. If you would provide me with an outline of the process to become illegal (retroactively if possible) and copies of the necessary forms, I would be most appreciative. Thank you for your assistance.
Your Loyal Constituent,
Get your Forms NOW! Call your Internal Revenue Service
1-800-289-1040.
Please pass this onto your friends so they can save on this great offer too!
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
File Under: Queasy Listening
Strange but true?
www.myspace.com/shamusdark
Sounding like the bastard off-spring of Frank Sinatra and Massive Attack, "Songs For Suicidal Lovers" is the debut album from enigmatic and reclusive vocalist, Shamus Dark. Featuring songs made famous by Frank Sinatra, as well as other classics from writers and performers as diverse as Chet Baker, Carlos Jobim, Hank Willams, and Joy Division, the album really is a different take on what has gone before. Like Shamus himself, it's a Dark album, not for the faint of heart.
From www.shamusdark.com (The Music)
One For My Baby (And One More For The Road)
Shamus says: "Well, this one's supposed to be the granddaddy of all saloon songs. Harold Arlen and Johnny Mercer wrote it in the 40's, for Sinatra I think. It's certainly associated with him, probably more so than Angel Eyes. We had to think twice about doing it. In the end, we thought that, although the older generation will be comparing our version with Frank's, well, they're all going to drop off the perch pretty soon, so it really doesn't matter. It's a fantastic arrangement and I would say, a fitting end to the album."
Read his story here - true or a false myth-build?
www.myspace.com/shamusdark
Sounding like the bastard off-spring of Frank Sinatra and Massive Attack, "Songs For Suicidal Lovers" is the debut album from enigmatic and reclusive vocalist, Shamus Dark. Featuring songs made famous by Frank Sinatra, as well as other classics from writers and performers as diverse as Chet Baker, Carlos Jobim, Hank Willams, and Joy Division, the album really is a different take on what has gone before. Like Shamus himself, it's a Dark album, not for the faint of heart.
From www.shamusdark.com (The Music)
One For My Baby (And One More For The Road)
Shamus says: "Well, this one's supposed to be the granddaddy of all saloon songs. Harold Arlen and Johnny Mercer wrote it in the 40's, for Sinatra I think. It's certainly associated with him, probably more so than Angel Eyes. We had to think twice about doing it. In the end, we thought that, although the older generation will be comparing our version with Frank's, well, they're all going to drop off the perch pretty soon, so it really doesn't matter. It's a fantastic arrangement and I would say, a fitting end to the album."
Read his story here - true or a false myth-build?
Chaps and Chapettes Unite!
WHAT IS THE CHAP?
http://www.thechap.net/
The Chap takes a wry look at the modern world through the steamed-up monocle of a more refined age, occasionally getting its sock suspenders into a twist at the unspeakable vulgarity of the twenty-first century.
Since 1999, the Chap has been championing the rights of that increasingly marginalised and discredited species of Englishman - the gentleman. The Chap believes that a society without courteous behaviour and proper headwear is a society on the brink of moral and sartorial collapse, and it seeks to reinstate such outmoded but indispensable gestures as hat doffing, giving up one's seat to a lady and regularly using a trouser press.
It is time for Chaps and Chapettes from all walks of life to stand up and be counted. But fear not, ye languid and ye plain idle: ours is a revolution based not on getting up early and exerting oneself - but a revolution that can be achieved by a single raised eyebrow over a monocle; the ordering of a glass of port in All Bar One; the wearing of a particularly fetching cardigan upon a visit to one's bookmaker.
See The Chap Manifesto where there are also links to
Enjoy, old boys and gals, enjoy!
http://www.thechap.net/
The Chap takes a wry look at the modern world through the steamed-up monocle of a more refined age, occasionally getting its sock suspenders into a twist at the unspeakable vulgarity of the twenty-first century.
Since 1999, the Chap has been championing the rights of that increasingly marginalised and discredited species of Englishman - the gentleman. The Chap believes that a society without courteous behaviour and proper headwear is a society on the brink of moral and sartorial collapse, and it seeks to reinstate such outmoded but indispensable gestures as hat doffing, giving up one's seat to a lady and regularly using a trouser press.
It is time for Chaps and Chapettes from all walks of life to stand up and be counted. But fear not, ye languid and ye plain idle: ours is a revolution based not on getting up early and exerting oneself - but a revolution that can be achieved by a single raised eyebrow over a monocle; the ordering of a glass of port in All Bar One; the wearing of a particularly fetching cardigan upon a visit to one's bookmaker.
See The Chap Manifesto where there are also links to
- Civilise the City: Several operatives entered the premises of Mr. R. McDonald, where they requested devilled kidneys, kedgeree and vintage champagne. Needless to say, they left empty-bladdered. Other flashpoints were Starbucks (where pots of oolong and china cups were not forthcoming); Specsavers (no monocles); All Bar One (cocktails off the menu)
- V&A art protest: Twenty seven followers of The Chap handcuffed themselves around Rachel Whiteread's 'Untitled (Room 101)' in the Cast Courts of the Victoria and Albert Museum, as a protest against the pointless intrusion by contemporary art pieces into public areas.
- Tate Modern protest: On a beautiful Spring morning, three men arrived at Tate Modern to attempt the unthinkable: an ascent of the South Face of Whiteread in the Turbine Hall. Ms Whiteread had spent months assembling 14,000 resin casts of an ordinary cardboard box into an impressive pile standing some sixty-seven feet high.
Enjoy, old boys and gals, enjoy!
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