Harry met Sally in a nightclub.
They enjoyed each other's company very much and at the end of the evening, Sally invited Harry to her place, where they quickly got involved in a very passionate and energetic session in bed together. Finally, tired and satisfied, they both lay back in the bed and snuggled up close to each other.
After a short while, Sally began tenderly stroking Harry's manhood. Surprised but appreciative, Harry commented, "Surely you can't be ready for more already?"
Sally replied, "No, but every now and then I get a bit nostalgic, and miss the days when I had mine."
Monday, August 28, 2006
Sunday, August 27, 2006
Bad Bad Puppy
Warning - contains offensive language but I found it funny!
Only click the link below if you are NOT easily offended and have your speakers turned down if you're at work or within earshot of people who are easily offended
Wednesday, August 23, 2006
British Tourists - Travel agency quotes
Where do we find these people! or are they really smart p!sstakers?
1. The brochure says no hairdressers in the resort - we are trainee hairdressers, will we be able to go there?
2. I believe you need a visa for Egypt - will MasterCard do?
3. I'm never flying to Jamaice with Airtours again. It took us nine hours but it only took the Americans three hours
4. I had a wonderful holiday in Kenya but I think I should bring to your Health & Safety department's attention the fact that the animals were not fenced in
5. Can I have a window seat please, it's a long journey and I would like some fresh air
6. In a hotel quiz: Q: Which beetle did the ancient Egyptians revere? A: I know this one, it was John Lennon!
1. The brochure says no hairdressers in the resort - we are trainee hairdressers, will we be able to go there?
2. I believe you need a visa for Egypt - will MasterCard do?
3. I'm never flying to Jamaice with Airtours again. It took us nine hours but it only took the Americans three hours
4. I had a wonderful holiday in Kenya but I think I should bring to your Health & Safety department's attention the fact that the animals were not fenced in
5. Can I have a window seat please, it's a long journey and I would like some fresh air
6. In a hotel quiz: Q: Which beetle did the ancient Egyptians revere? A: I know this one, it was John Lennon!
Laughing Babies
You may find this funny... even if you're not really into cute ickle bundles of fun!!
Get this video and more at MySpace.com
Saturday, August 05, 2006
Church bulletins
Thank God for church ladies with typewriters.
The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.
-------------------------------------------------------------
The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks on the Water." The sermon tonight:
"Searching for Jesus."
-------------------------------------------------------------
Our youth basketball team is back in action Wednesday at 8 PM in the
recreation hall. Come out and watch us kill Christ the King.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of those
things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.
---------------------------------------------------- ---------
The peace making meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due to a conflict.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at
someone who is hard to love. Say "Hell" to someone who doesn't care much about you.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Miss Charlene Mason sang "I will not pass this way again," giving obvious
pleasure to the congregation.
-------------------------------------------------------------
For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery
downstairs.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the
Help they can get.
-------------------------------------------------------------
The Rector will preach his farewell message after which the choir will
sing: "Break Forth into Joy."
-------------------------------------------------------------
Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the
church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.
-------------------------------------------------------------
A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music
will follow.
-------------------------------------------------------------
At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What Is Hell?"
Come early and listen to our choir practice.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several
new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled.
Proceeds will be used to cripple children.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered.
-------------------------------------------------------------
The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and
gracious hostility.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM - prayer and medication to follow.
-------------------------------------------------------------
The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may
be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.
-------------------------------------------------------------
This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park across from
the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10 AM. All ladies are
invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B. S. is done.
-------------------------------------------------------------
The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation would
lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM. Please use the back door.
-------------------------------------------------------------
The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the Church
basement Friday at 7 PM. The congregation is invited to attend this
tragedy.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church.
Please use large double door at the side entrance.
-------------------------------------------------------------
The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new tithing campaign slogan
last Sunday: "I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours"
The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.
-------------------------------------------------------------
The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks on the Water." The sermon tonight:
"Searching for Jesus."
-------------------------------------------------------------
Our youth basketball team is back in action Wednesday at 8 PM in the
recreation hall. Come out and watch us kill Christ the King.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of those
things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.
---------------------------------------------------- ---------
The peace making meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due to a conflict.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at
someone who is hard to love. Say "Hell" to someone who doesn't care much about you.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Miss Charlene Mason sang "I will not pass this way again," giving obvious
pleasure to the congregation.
-------------------------------------------------------------
For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery
downstairs.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the
Help they can get.
-------------------------------------------------------------
The Rector will preach his farewell message after which the choir will
sing: "Break Forth into Joy."
-------------------------------------------------------------
Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the
church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.
-------------------------------------------------------------
A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music
will follow.
-------------------------------------------------------------
At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What Is Hell?"
Come early and listen to our choir practice.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several
new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled.
Proceeds will be used to cripple children.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered.
-------------------------------------------------------------
The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and
gracious hostility.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM - prayer and medication to follow.
-------------------------------------------------------------
The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may
be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.
-------------------------------------------------------------
This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park across from
the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10 AM. All ladies are
invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B. S. is done.
-------------------------------------------------------------
The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation would
lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM. Please use the back door.
-------------------------------------------------------------
The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the Church
basement Friday at 7 PM. The congregation is invited to attend this
tragedy.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church.
Please use large double door at the side entrance.
-------------------------------------------------------------
The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new tithing campaign slogan
last Sunday: "I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours"
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